Taking a look at the 1990 terrible movie featuring goblins in our bad movie column

By Max Brown and Luke Gentle

Staff Writers

Starring: Michael Paul Stephenson, George Hardy

Director: Claudio Fragrasso (as Drake Lloyd)

Arguably one of the most famous bad movies, “Troll 2” has no relation to the original “Troll.” The beasts in the movie are goblins, not trolls, and the movie only carries its title to dupe fans of the original “Troll.” The brainchild of Italian director Claudio Fragrasso and his wife Rosella, the plot (vegetarian goblins turn humans into vegetables to eat) was Rosella’s jab at her preachy vegetarian friends.

Almost none of the actors had any experience, and one was even a stoned schizophrenia patient out of the clinic on a day pass. The language barrier between the Italian crew and American directors creates some bizarre dialogue.

The primitive special effects consist mainly of green food coloring to represent the goblins’ veggie potion. The plot, sadly, is even less sophisticated, culminating in a strange sex scene involving an ear of corn toward the end of the movie.

The film, like so many other sub-par sci-fi films, has gained a large cult following; large enough that the child star of the movie, Michael Paul Stevenson, created a successful documentary of the movie, “Best Worst Movie,” in 2009.

The plot follows the Waits family as they prepare to go on a vacation in the conspicuously named farming town of Nilbog. The son of the family, Joshua (Stephenson) is warned by the ghost of his Grandpa Seth (Robert Ormsby) that Nilbog is a goblin stronghold that is sure death for the family. Joshua’s protests fall on deaf ears, however, as his father Michael (Hardy) insists on continuing the vacation to fulfill his fantasies of living off the land.

Meanwhile, sister Holly (Connie Young) expresses her frustrations at her boyfriend Elliott (Jason Wright) for spending more time with his friends than with her, even accusing him of being a homosexual. Elliott asks to come with on the trip but doesn’t mention that he’ll be bringing his friends. The next day, the Waits family departs for Nilbog, with Elliot and his horny friends in tow.

Upon arriving, Grandpa Seth appears and informs Joshua that the food left for them is tainted with the goblin’s veggie potion and that he must stop the family from eating it (why he can’t just tell the family himself is unclear). Joshua, thinking quickly, deduces that the best course of action is to take a whiz all over the food. Unsurprisingly, this makes everyone in the family angry with him, and he is sent to bed.

Meanwhile, Elliot and company arrive in Nilbog and discover that no one bothered to pack food. One of Elliot’s friends, Arnold, decides to go on a food run when he sees a terrified girl running from some goblins. Arnold confronts the goblins in efforts to get in with the girl. He is hit with a spear, however, and the duo runs away, seeking shelter in a church.

There, they meet Creedence Leonore Gielgud (Deborah Reed), a druid priestess and queen of the goblins, and are fed veggie potion. The girl transforms first, having already consumed some potion before meeting Arnold, and is devoured by the goblins while Arnold delivers his famous line.

The next day, Joshua sees a street sign in a mirror and realizes that Nilbog is (gasp) “goblin” spelled backward. Now it is a race against time for Joshua to warn his family, for Elliot to find a decent meal (oh, and rescue Arnold), and for Elliot’s remaining friends to get laid.

The most striking thing about “Troll 2” is the bizarre characterization. Watching the film gives the impression that the director has read a few books about people but has never actually met or interacted with anyone.

The characters behave in such bizarre, unexpected ways and make such strange decisions that you can’t help but love it.

Credit where it’s due, this movie had me surprised at every turn (in the sense that opening your trash can to uncover a territorial raccoon is a surprise.) The special effects, while laughable in their own right, will never hold a candle to the delightfully asinine characters.

Due to its primitive special effects, absurd characters, and nonsensical dialogue, this movie earns 1 double-decker bologna sandwiches out of ten.